There’s nothing wrong with comfort.
Those are the lovely words I said to myself this week as I grappled to make a choice. Comfort is good right?
What if comfort comes at the direct expense of growth?
Many times we make choices based on what is comfortable. Yet comfort also typically implies no challenge. Unfortunately though challenge and growth seem to be inextricably linked!
The question of the week: How often in your life are you choosing what feels safe, over what helps you expand?
First of all congrats on change on spreding Vanessa to other parts of the world. I believe Fear is a word that has ben put in our culture…..before time its an energy that our parents put in our brains, people around us that dont like to move out of their comfort zone and say we are the crazy ones…..The path you are on or the path I was on and would like to be back on is not the the middle for people..people like to live in the middle so we automatic that button to fear..we like to know the answers before we jump out of the plane… will the shoot open? When you surf will I really make that wave? when we meet someone will this last? Its not so much fear I think because when you look at the defenition it means :: An unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, I mean I dont believe me moving is dangerous I dont believe deep down inside you believe you are in danger to go to a new place like Bali…and the other part of that defenition is likely to cause pain, or a threat. I blieve its more unkown feeling, we want the crystal ball we want the tarrot cards to tell us… learning to Let go and walk on that path of the unknown then yes could sound like fear but I think its more to that I think its relearning to let go of what we were taught from our parents our culture our surronding and to trully let go…..and see whats next playing it safe yes is boring for me its killing me slowly… and for some it works but most people I know that play it safe later on one way or another regret it and regret can be a cancer regret will be a mourning of something you cant do over…Our society puts these fears in us like for example I wanted to move to Austin TX at one time and being with a husband that is always safe in ways of change he looked at me like I was crazy and I started to beleive that my belief of change was crazy Lisa ..now that I have four kids and pets I believe that I am wrong to want to change so I search for things still in the middle. I search for things that keep me safe by picking places that a moving truck wont have to much to drive me to or that would be ok for my husband I am allowing myself to be comfortable for others sake..I am also tired so its comfortable to just say screw it this is to much work…Think of that word EXPANSION I mean if we sit in that bubble or the comfort zone we dont expand..we dont allow this physical pull us out into a journey to create ….to asist with the serendipity of our lives…what story do we have without getting out of our comfort zone..I believe my safe path is not mine its others I allow myself to stay at the base waiting for the ball to come my way…because the other baseball players are telling me to stay there until they say to move until they see that its safe to move out of base…what If I feel I have this one that I know I can make it to second base ??? and lets say I did go for it and I did nto make it I wont live in regret I wont live in what if” at least I tried…….
I like your description Lisa. I normally describe it as a fear of the unknown. A fear of being out of control. But I prefer the types of metaphors you used to describe the sense of how it works within us. We are always going to walk a path where we balance in the middle our needs for aliveness versus the needs of the environment- in this case I am referring to your husband and your kids. I think the most challenging element is when our tribe thinks of us as “crazy” or “imbalanced.” We question ourselves because if our loved one thinks this way there may be some truth to it. In reality I think sanity is subjective and that there are different types of people who need different things to thrive and who offer different gifts to the world. When we are in harmony we can balance one another out adding richness, depth and alternate views. However it can also get into a struggle where instead we each try to convince the other that our way is the way. You are looking at some big existential issues. And in truth only you can chose what’s right for you. Sending you blessings in this journey girl!!!
thank you and look foward to seeing the path you are on and how it unfolds..
Sorry so many mis-spelled words I have only a few minutes at times to get stuff out with the kids around..